Someone has sent this 'conversation' to my mail a few days ago. Since English is a 'hot' topic now, I thought of sharing this with you. Just relax and read it for a laugh:
British English vs Malaysian English
Who says our English is teruk? Just read below -
Ours is simple, short, concise, straight-to-the-point, effective etc.
WHEN GIVING A CUSTOMER BAD NEWS
Britons: I'm sorry, sir, we don't seem to have the size you want, but if you give me a moment, I can call the other outlets for you.
Malaysians: Size 12 no stock.
RETURNING A CALL
Britons: Hello, this is John Smith. Did you call me a few moments ago?
Malaysians: Hello, who call?
ASKING SOMEONE TO MAKE WAY
Britons: Excuse me, I would like to get by. Would you please make way?
Malaysians: S-kew me...
WHEN SOMEONE OFFERS TO PAY
Britons: Put your wallet away, this drink is on me.
Malaysians: No need lah.
WHEN ASKING FOR PERMISSION
Britons: Excuse me, would it be possible for me to enter through this door?
Malaysians: (pointing at the door) Can ah?
Britons: Please make yourself right at home.
Malaysians: No need shy shy one lah!
WHEN DOUBTING SOMEONE
Britons: I don't recall you giving me the money.
Malaysians: Where got?
WHEN DECLINING AN OFFER
Britons: I would prefer not to do that, if you don't mind.
Malaysians: Don't want lah.
IN DISAGREEING ON A TOPIC OF DISCUSSION
Britons: Tom, I have to stop you here, I really have to disagree with what you said about the issue.
Malaysians: You mad ah?
WHEN ASKING SOMEONE TO LOWER THEIR VOICE
Britons: Excuse me, could you please lower your voice?
Malaysians: Shut up lah!
WHEN ASSESSING A TIGHT SITUATION
Britons: We seem to be in a bit of a predicament at the moment.
Malaysians: Die lah!!
WHEN TRYING TO FIND OUT WHAT HAD HAPPENED
Britons: Will someone tell me what has just happened?
Malaysians: What happened ah? Why like that one?
WHEN SOMEONE DID SOMETHING WRONG
Britons: This isn't the way to do it. Here, let me show you.
Malaysians: Like that also don't know how to do!
WHEN ONE IS ANGRY
Britons: Would you mind not disturbing me?
Malaysians: Celaka you!